This past weekend we had an Easter egg hunt at mom's house for all the kids at the church. We hit the weather just right, because it has been so crazy. (It will possibly be below freezing in the morning.) It was so great to have a fun Saturday activity for the kids and myself. It helps me so much when I am able to talk and interact with other adults (especially moms) during the day. I have realized since being a stay-at-home mom, that I am definitely an extrovert (I re-charge when I am around other people). It is very hard for me to be at home for several days on end with not much adult interaction. But now with three, it is so hard to get out and go, that I find myself at home quite a bit.I have talked a lot with close friends and family about the loneliness and isolation that being a stay-at-home mom can bring. In our society (or at least in this small town) I haven't found a lot of moms who are in the same situation that I am in. I think around this time last year is when I really started getting into the blogworld. It has become such an outlet and a source of communication to other moms. If only some of you lived close by, so we could have real-live conversations about our struggles and joys of being a mom! In spite of this struggle-I am beyond thankful that the Lord is allowing me to stay home and raise my children! I am confident He has called me to do this and know that He will provide and see me through these days which can be lonely at times.
One of the most recent challenges I have run across is 1) Just getting to the grocery store-I don't think it would even be worth my time to take all three, so it's best for me to find a time when Steven is at home. 2) Planning well and getting what I need so that I don't need to go back every few days. 3) I need to go without Andrew because if I sit his carseat in the cart there isn't enough room for very many groceries...so this obviously means going in between feedings which then puts me on a time clock, and you know with Wal-Mart that isn't so easy! This week is going to be busy (Andrew has 2 doctor's appts. and Steven's mom is coming!) so I worked really hard to make a very efficient grocery list, managed to get to the store yesterday-all by myself!!! (I did almost knock a few people out with my cart trying to beat the feeding clock). But...I did it and I have 2 meals made and frozen already and will attempt to get one more done by evening so that I don't have any cooking to do this week! I'm hoping this system is going to work for me. The job of meal-planning, grocery shopping, and cooking (and doing it all on a budget) is one that never ends and at this stage of my life I haven't yet found a system that I really love. What do you do? I would love to hear!
7 comments:
Ann, I totally hear you! Grocery shopping is hard enough at this phase, let alone PLANNING for it! It's almost too much!
I'm with you on needing a better system. The whole organized, scheduled life has never been mine. My mom plans her menu each month and writes dinners on the calendar. Guess what? That's not flexible enough for me. . . so in the past I have written on a post-it all the meals for which I have the ingredients on hand and put it on my calendar, pull the recipies for those meals, and mark them off as I make them. That way I'm not a deer in headlights when 3:30 comes and I haven't made time to decide what's for dinner. *AND* we're not eating frozen pizza or P.B. & J.
I used to shop grocery store sales and only buy items that were on sale, stocking up and planning meals based on ingredients on sale, but I don't make that a priority nowadays, and I am pleased to just make it to the store every 2 weeks, stocking up on things I happen to notice are a great deal while I'm at the store.
You may have noticed that these things are written in the past tense. I need to work on that.
We're spending more for groceries right now, but I see this as a passing phase. We're surviving, and sometimes that's enough!
Hey Ann!
I am sorry to hear that things are rough! I am also sorry that there aren't more SAHM in your town. Rest assure, I will be at home this summer (and forvere :), and I would love it if we could meet up and/or do more together. I know I would be glad for you to drop off 1 or 2 kids if you need to run into Huntsville for something (going places w/ 1 or 2 is easier than 3, right?). I am sure we could find a place half-way where we could meet up for a brief playdate :) Although, mine won't be playing so much yet...he he.
We'll talk closer to time. Remember, these sacrifices that you make are worth the impact on the kingdom that they bring. Hang in there!
Oh Ann, I wish you still lived down the street..I feel like we could really get together and be of encouragement! I feel what you are going through, and yes, it is challenging phase. It won't last forever, and before you know it, you'll feel like a pro taking all three to Target! I usually don't go grocery shopping w/o Troy these days, but when I do go out, I always pack lunches and healthy snacks to keep them occupied.
The only other thing I have to say is that the Lord's been really teaching (and gently rebuking me) in the area of perfectionism and expectations. When we focus on the fact that this IS what the Lord's given for us to do, and that it honors Him (not a perfect house, or perfect children, or lots of availability to minister, etc.), I find I'm freed to enjoy the hard work. *Wish I could say this all in person.* I spent several days alone with all four recently, and at the end of it, I learned to just ENJOY my children and discipline consistently. It was a bit life-changing for me! Been reading "Because He Loves Me" by Elyse Fitzpatrick, but in having a woman of great encouragement through the pages of writing, the book, "Feminine Appeal" by Carolyn Mahaney is my absolute fave. Also, have you read, "One With A Shepherd" by Mary Somerville (on being a pastor's wife.) All are so good. Okay--I never leave this long of a comment, but just felt burdened to say all this. Love to you, and praying for you!
Well, of course we have talked about all of this already, but I just wanted to encourage you with what I have already said--one, to pick the most important things--food on the table and clothes to wear, and try to let the rest go. Two, Andrew is still so young, as are Ellie and Luke, and as Tutti always says to me, these are the dog days of motherhood--putting one foot in front of the other and taking it one day at a time, and one day they will be older. It will not always be this hard. I think the hardest part must be not having other SAHM. If I didn't have my SAHM friends, I think I would have told Scott we had to pack it up and move to Alabama a long time ago. Hang in there!!
Hey, I also wanted to tell you that another mom I know who has six children ranging in age from 3 to 18, says that these baby/toddler years are, indeed, the dog days of motherhood, but that they are also the glory days. She says that never again will our children want us so much. These are the hardest days and the sweetest days.
Ann- I totally understand where you are coming from... I thrive off of adult interaction, and that short time I was on maternity leave was so difficult for me- I can't imagine being home all the time with three small children. You are such an inspiration! I really wish I was closer to you- I would love to get together :) Oh, and the grocery store is such a nightmare with a baby! I tried it on Sunday, and I will never do it again. I also struggle with meal planning, I just can't seem to get organized- I am hoping that I can get better at this- if you come across any good ideas let me know!
Awww! Oh cool! Good for you on the cooking. :) Hope that I get to see you in June!! :)
Hollen
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